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Joke of the Day

"[at church] ""I'm here for the blood."""

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"What do you call a group of crows dressed as geese? A murder most fowl"
"I found a company that describes your dick! microsoft"
"Hotel coffee is like having sex in a canoe... It's fucking close to water."
"Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he neverlands."
"What is the hamburgers' motto? If at first you don't succeed fry fry again!"
"My girlfriend is like /r/Jokes She tries to tell me that she hasn't cheated on me, but I've already heard that one."
"the difference between me and humpty dumpty is that his friends looked at him and thought to themselves ""we should put him back together"""
"Being Mute. Being mute means never having to say you're sorry."
"The Night Life North Korea has just announced their own time zone ...Meaning the world now has the first official Party time."