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Joke of the Day

"Hotel coffee is like having sex in a canoe... It's fucking close to water."

"If 80s movies taught me anything, it's that anyone with a sweater tied around their shoulders is a villain"

"They're giving Caitlyn Jenner ANOTHER TV show Apparently, they have her competing in the Olympics again. It's going to be called ""Drag Races""."

"I haven't made egg jokes in a while I thought I'd take a crack at them"

"A man in tights was found near a rock. What happened? Superman committed suicide."

"When Granpa revealed an exit wound scar from WWII it gave me strength to show him the owie owie bruise I suffered closing a faulty pizza box"

"Why are knives always the funniest students at utensil school? Because they're the class cut-ups."

"The bonus of simple origami is twofold."

"Remember those days when using ""protection"" meant wearing your helmet?"

"How many Communists does is take to screw in a light bulb? All of them."