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Joke of the Day
"All jeans are skinny jeans... ...if you're fat enough."
Next Joke
"I tried the blowjob trick with dogs and peanut butter I don't know what the fuss is all about. It tasted terrible."
"Last night my friend trashed a Chinese restaurant... Told him I was horrified by his wonton destruction"
"I go to McDonald's once a month just to replenish the napkin stash in my car"
"Team Rocket Were Caught Performing a Lewd Sex Act... Ass to Meowth"
"What do Australians call upside down cake? Cake."
"When I go to the bar I get a Lindsey Lohan. It's a Shirley Temple with a lot of coke"
"Two guys are walking when they come across a dog on the sidewalk, licking his balls. One guys says, ""I wish I could do that."" The other guy says, ""You better pet him first to make sure he's friendly."""
"me: an open casket with my vape pen hanging from my mouth wedding DJ: i meant final requests for songs man"
"Trolling my FB friends by commenting ""Looking good ;)"" on solo pics of their husbands"