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Joke of the Day

"[describing criminal to sketch artist] ""No, no his nose was a bit more avant-garde than that. His eyes suggested he'd lost a ladder."""

Next Joke
 
"Why are Father Christmas' reindeer like a cricket match? Because they're both stopped by the rein."
"The England Football team..... visited a Brazilian orphanage this morning. 'It's heartbreak to see their sad little faces with no hope' said Jose, age 6."
"Racism Q: How do you find a white person in the condiment aisle? A: UM EXCUSE YOU THAT'S RACIST!!!!----oh look, there they are!"
"Me: SORRY I HAVE TO HANG UP I'M HEADING INTO A TUNNEL * hangs up land-line *"
"Telling somebody you love them is like telling them your dream from last night. You can explain all you want. They'll never understand."
"Melania Trump released a statement about the alleged plagiarism. These accusation really hurt me, and my kids. Sasha and Malia."
"My mother is displeased with me. In other shocking news, water is wet and the sun is bright."
"Where does Arnie sit at the movies? Aisle B - Back."
"If you are looking for a way to describe olive oil, how about ""yellow and you can't drink it"""