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Joke of the Day
"I've stopped trying to understand sandwiches with a third piece of bread in the middle."
Next Joke
"whenever someone says happy birthday.... all I hear is ""Happy anniversary of the day your face rubbed your moms vagina"""
"Hillary Clinton is a strong woman who doesn't need Bill. Besides, the FBI has been fingering her for a while now."
"Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me. Everyone I told swore they wouldn't tell anyone else."
"What basic skill do herb farmers always struggle with? Thyme management"
"It's a shame the Parisian Christmas Buttplug was destroyed... It fitted in so well."
"Every time someone tells a bulimia joke... Every time someone tells a bulimia joke I throw up in disgust. Please keep them coming."
"Q: What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy? A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up."
"""Sir, it appears the bomb was hidden in the Japanese man's beer!"" ""Looks like the killer... BREW his mind."""
"I think unscented candles are bullshit... cuz every candle smells like something's burning. (Best read in a Hedberg voice.)"