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Joke of the Day

"Every time someone tells a bulimia joke... Every time someone tells a bulimia joke I throw up in disgust. Please keep them coming."

"I was in the mall the other day, and suddenly I found myself on the top floor ""Boy"", I thought to myself, ""that sure escalated quickly"""

"""I'm not that kind of girl."" ~That kind of girl"

"My brother said his wife is ""like a plunger"" when she gets drunk. She likes to bring up old shit. Hahahaha"

"How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America? They had reservations."

"I think I want a job cleaning mirrors... ...it's just something I can see myself doing."

"Little Jack Warner Sat in the corner A finger in every pie. He stuck in his thumb And pulled out a bung And said ""Lets all go to Dubai!"""

"TIFU Reverse Cowgirl"

"breakfast in bed? babe I thought you said brofest in bed. *gestures at chad and brad to leave* *whispers* we can still play frisbee later."

"One time I fell off a 20ft ladder, then climbed right back up and jumped off a second time to show that ladder who's in charge."