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Joke of the Day

"I found a wallet today, and as a practicing Christian, I asked myself ""what would Jesus do?"" So I turned it into wine."

"A man goes to the lawyer: ""What is your fee?"" Lawyer says: ""1000 US dollars for 3 questions."" Man: ""Wow - so much! Isn't it a bit expensive?"" Lawyer: ""Yes, what is your third question?"""

"How does Google clean their facilities? They use Google Mops."

"What's the difference between a paedophile and a roller coaster? You have to be a over 5ft to ride a roller coaster"

"i don't drink to forget, i drink to remember how much i like drinking."

"If I got a boyfriend I wouldn't know what to do... What do they eat? How often do they need to be walked? Can they be house trained?"

"What do you get when you cross the Atlantic ocean with the Titanic? About halfway. ^^I'll ^^see ^^myself ^^out..."

"Knowledge is knowing that tomatoes are a fruit Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad."

"I'm too immature for adultery."

"Last night, I got in touch with my inner self... That's the last time buying cheap toilet paper."