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Joke of the Day

"First Kiss BF finally Kissed Her GF GF: Wow i can't believe that a Kiss is so nice.. BF: Ofcourse I told you.. Is it Your First Kiss? (smiling) GF: Yes! since my EX Boyfriends wants sex right away"

"When I was your age, I was outside all day until dark 15: The batteries on cell phones must have been a lot better back then Me: ........."

"A man walks into a police station ""My car has been stolen"" he says laughingly. ""Your car has been stolen, but why are you laughing then?"" The officer says. ""Because my wife was still in it!"""

"What do you give a train driver for Christmas ? Platform shoes !"

"I said to this bloke,""I'm going to be performing in the play *Hamlet* at a local theatre."" He said,""Are you being facetious?"" I said,""No- Polonius."""

"What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend? My girlfriend knows about my wife."

"Before Batgirl can become Batwoman she has to have a Batmitzvah."

"The only thing I want to ""portion control"" is my time spent at work."

"How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just Juan."

"An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. ""You don't want to try these techniques at home...."