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Joke of the Day

"A seal walks into a club. The end."

"I only stop browsing Reddit when I accidentally hit something ..or when it's time to wipe"

"Dating tip: Don't do it, a disturbingly high percentage of people are actually flesh eating insects in human suits. Just stay home instead."

"You should never criticize a Muslim... until you've walked a mile in their suicide vest."

"I started my own traffic control company. It's a slow-moving business."

"My wife gives me the speaking treatment."

"Sometimes it's nice to feel another body pressed up against your own, even if rigor mortis has already set it."

"My deaf girlfriend was talking in her sleep last night... She nearly took my fucking eye out."

"I used to tell this great joke about homeopathy. But I've told it so many times the humour has been diluted."

"What is a mountain climber's favorite drink? Anything on the rocks."