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Joke of the Day

"I started my own traffic control company. It's a slow-moving business."

"To the guy who invented Zero: Thanks for nothing!"

"LPT...never trust a Genie who.... calls his penis his LAMP. I never got my wishes."

"How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb? No one knows, the findings never replicate."

"SAE used to be jokingly called Somebody Anybody Everybody I guess they wanted to make it clear that wasn't true."

"My wife can't cook so she asked me for help in baking a cake. I told her to separate 2 eggs... She put one in the bedroom and one in the bathroom.. Ijit."

"Why was the centipede dropped from the insect football team ? He took too long to put his boots on !"

"How to make holy water. You take normal water, and you just boil the hell out of it."

"I was just casually strolling down the street... and suddenly when I looked up, I saw a baseball getting bigger and bigger, and I was wondering why that was. Then it hit me."

"My wife said she wanted a divorce for Christmas. I told her I did not want to spend that much."