119661

Joke of the Day

"Some people say they have a hamster on a wheel in their head. I have 4 squirrels fighting over an acorn."

"100% of Nickelback fans drive drunk."

"I want to put hot dogs on my fingers so I have extra long, floppy, hot dog fingers."

"What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race."

"toothpaste is a big scam. if ur tooth falls out, it stays out. toothpaste Will Not paste it back in."

"A motorist was pulled over by a traffic cop. ""Excuse me, sir,"" said the cop. ""Do you realize your wife fell out of the car two miles back?"" ""Thank God,"" he said. ""I thought I'd gone deaf!"""

"Relationship status: held a door open for a girl, so she used the other one"

"It's 4/20 and I'm not looking forward to weeding through all the bad jokes today."

"What's a kidnapper's favorite kind of shoes? White Vans"

"They should name American Pharoah's first offspring ""Regression to the Mean"" Because, you know, statistics."