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Joke of the Day

"Vampire was searching the garbage... ...and the man came and asked him... M: what are you doing? V: I am looking for used tampons... M: why? V: My wife is sick, I have to make her some tea!"

"I call my penis ""Pizza"" Because when you get it it is firm, gooey, and delicious. But if you leave it out to long it gets hard and crusty"

"What's the difference between a joke and 100 dicks in your ass? You can't take a joke."

"My friend drowned last week, so I had a wreath made in the shape of a life jacket in his memory. I'm sure it's what he would have wanted. -Milton Jones"

"What does a man with a 10 inch dick have for breakfast? Well, this morning I had bacon, eggs, juice..."

"[NSFW?]What do you call 100 Jews on a train? Anything you want because they're not coming back."

"You know what they say about hand jobs and homosexuals... They come hand in hand"

"So my girlfriend throws up in the morning also her stomach is getting bigger. It's time I get it through my head.....She drinks to much.."

"The pope walks into a mosque The imam says ""Hey, why the wrong faith?"""

"Did you know that Erwin Schrodinger's funeral was closed casket? He was buried (|Dead> + |Alive>) / sqrt(2)"