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Joke of the Day

"[dinner party] *removing myself from table* Excuse me, I have to take this. *picks up host's dog* *leaves*"

"I saw a gay midget the other day I thought wow that's a little queer"

"Him: ""Do you want to cuddle?"" Me: ""Yeah, let me call the dog."""

"When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket."

"If I had a quarter for every woman I made love to Id have 45 cents."

"A dyslexic woman walks into a bar And puts it on"

"Why do they call me seven days? Because I'm weak."

"That ONE time In class you raise your hand, and some motherfucker screams out the answer."

"Knock Knock.. Who's there? Razor. Razor who? Razor hands it's the police. I need friends."

"Why does a rooster watch TV ? For hentertainment !"