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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between news of the US elections and Madeleine McCann? News of the elections is getting old."

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"Trying not to take my dog's sighing personally."
"Did you hear about the Florida pastor's Quran burning? His actions are incendiary."
"Some choices are easier than others: An emergency doctor's appt vs a much needed hair appt. At least if I die my hair will be cute."
"What's a woman's best curve? Her smile."
"THE RIGHT ONE HOW CAN YOU BE CERTAIN YOU FOUND THE RIGHT ONE? AFTER YOU PASS GAS,THEY HAVENT FILED FOR AN ORDER OF PROTECTION"
"Congratulations to Alabama for making same sex marriage legal Now the men can finally marry their brothers"
"Since Ghandi walked barefoot, and ate a diet giving him bad breath, he was... A super Calloused Fragile Mystic Hexed by Halitosis!"
"Ronda Rousey walks into a bar... and gets knocked the fuck out"
"2 integrals are working out at the gym One asks the other 'What are you doing today?' 2: 'Well, I think I can really push my limits' 1: 'Oh right, are you sure?' 2: 'I'm definite'."