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Joke of the Day

"Some of us learn from the mistakes of others. The rest of us have to be the others."

"My coworkers will stand around confused during a fire drill but the office turns into the Hunger Games when there's lunch brought in by reps"

"How many votes does it take to change a light bulb? Votes don't change shit."

"Why shouldn't you talk to someone with a brain tumor?.... ..because they've got a lot on their mind."

"Winning chess is the same as winning women. All it takes is the right amount of checks."

"For Easter, I will hide pieces of IKEA furniture all over the house and then have my kid assemble it. If she succeeds, she gets chocolate."

"Farewell to the last original piece of Joan Rivers... her soul"

"What did Pikachu say to Ash Catchem? Pikachu"

"What's the difference between Americans and Brits? Brits think 200 miles is a long distance, Americans think 200 years is a long time."

"Gay Marriage in China... (Joke Originally from Comedian Jeffery Ross) Why Is gay Marriage Illegal in China? NO SUBSTITUTIONS!"