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Joke of the Day

"If the rumors about Apple manufacturing a driverless car... Then I can't wait to drive into the middle of the Atlantic ocean!"

"The problem with getting a BJ from a deaf chick They can still talk while they do it."

"I would like to learn more about frequencies But whenever I try to measure it, it only Hertz"

"Music Jokes! Jake: What did the Clarinet say to the naughty Trumpet? Sean: What? Jake: Why are you always in treble?"

"Australians don't have sex. ... Australians mate"

"*Panda walks into shop, ""A packet of nuts please."" Assistant: ""pandas don't eat nuts."" -""dammit"" panda suit opens and 36 squirrels run off."

"TIFU by taking a shower. I wonder if they've noticed it's missing yet?"

"What do you call a man with no arms or legs who likes to go swimming? Bob."

"I was going to paint my computer black thinking it would run faster... ...but it didn't work."

"I feel sorry for all of the atheists named Christian."