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Joke of the Day

"The Expendables 2 Review: I haven't seen that much shooting in a movie since I went to watch The Dark Knight Rises."

"My friend offered me a nice stable job. I declined because I don't like horses"

"I just met my 4 day old nephew yesterday, and today he acts like he doesn't even know me. Kids are assholes."

"What's the Syrian girl doing on the swing? Pissing off the sniper"

"The Expendables 2 Review: I haven't seen that much shooting in a movie since I went to watch The Dark Knight Rises."

"What's an Australian Kiss? A French kiss down under ;) *first post here, a coworker of mine told me the joke. Go easy :)*"

"Melania Trump is so dumb... She couldn't get a degree if her own husband opened a university. (edit: word)"

"What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion."

"I'll do anything to prove I'm not lazy. I'll go the whole three yards."

"My ex claimed I had a 'hero' complex, but whatever I think wearing my underwear on the outside of my pants is a bold & brave fashion choice"