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Joke of the Day

"I'm convinced that those at work who drum on every available surface incessantly killed things as a child."

"VW just released a new diesel car... It's called the Cheetah. ... credits to a colleague at work"

"How many libertarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, the lightbulb has to pull itself up by the bootstraps and screw itself in"

"Black children never know the joy of finding their name in a personalized keychain display."

"Just played Uno with my Mexican co-workers... ...they stole all the green cards."

"Left a plaster cast of my mouth at the bakery so they know exactly how big to bake the cupcakes"

"Didn't support the troops, saw a bumper sticker, now do."

"What's worse than finding a dead monkey on your piano? Finding a diseased beaver on your organ."

"Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a licensed six offender."

"Why do flamingos sleep with one leg up? Because if they slept with two legs up they'd fall over"