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Joke of the Day

"I don't get why people think the homeless are unclean... when they have the mintiest breaths I've ever smelled."

"I never ask anyone, ""what kind of dog is that?"" because they'll tell you. God will they tell you."

"Why is Waldo always wearing striped clothing? because he doesn't want to be spotted"

"I'm an astronaut, and recently decided to invite my girlfriend to my work. She said she needed some space."

"Y'all have heard about the WTC7 fallling down right? What did it fall from? Peer Pressure?"

"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball She choked"

"""My research shows that vegetables triple in vitamin content when used as pizza toppings,"" said the awesome scientist in my imagination."

"*grabs knife, cuts forehead, lies on floor* Wife walks in: ""WHAT HAPPENED?"" ""A burglar came in right when I was about to clean the house"""

"Oh, I see. ""Adam and Steve"" is gay, but ""Adam dates his own rib"" is perfectly acceptable."

"Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs? Right Where You Left Him."