209024

Joke of the Day

"Showier thoughts pt 3 Someone used this water to flush poop and now here I am washing my body with it."

"At least I now know why the lions leave the plains before the end of summer. Because the Pride goeth before the Fall."

"What do you call a drug addict that's allergic to heroin? Cracktose Intolerant"

"A dozen fish are in a tank. Then one proclaims: ""Can anybody drive this thing?"""

"What has 5 fingers but isn't your hand? My hand."

"If I had but one life to give for my country it would be a lawyer's."

"A lorry load of wigs has been stolen from down town. Police are combing the area."

"Me: We broke up. Male Friend: You okay? You need to talk? Shoulder to cry on? You want to come over? Go to dinner? Sleep with me finally?"

"Why do woman have legs? So their feet don't smell like pussy."

"What muscle do Egyptian soldiers generally lose control of, shortly before major battles? The sphinxster ...."