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Joke of the Day
"Lost both my arms in an accident. The whole incident left me utterly humerless."
Next Joke
"I'm really bad at measuring the correct amount of pasta, so if you and 79 of your friends want spaghetti tonight, come over"
"I gave up my seat for a blind man on the bus today That's how I lost my job as a bus driver"
"Did you hear the one about the Easter Bunny who sat on a bee? It's a tender tail!"
"Doctor: ""I think this patient is dying. What blood type is he?"" Nurse: ""B positive."" Doctor: ""Okay. I don't think this patient is dying."""
"When it comes to making jokes about heart palpitations I never skip a beat"
"Do they really need to add 'Alive' to 'Sexiest Man' or am I grossly underestimating the number of necrophiliacs in the world?"
"Most women who've dated me will tell you I'm about an 8 on the pain scale."
"Q: What did the dumb blonde say when told that ""Scheherezade"" was composed by Rimsky-Korsakov ? A: ""Why'd his mom choose to call him Rimsky of all names ?!!?"""
"Just bought a pair of velcro shoes. What a rip off."