202602

Joke of the Day

"Most women who've dated me will tell you I'm about an 8 on the pain scale."

"My friend said I twist everything to my advantage. I took it as a compliment."

"Why couldn't the drunk make it as a lawyer? He couldn't pass the bar."

"Why did Ernest Hemingway kill himself? He was paid per word."

"How manny women dose it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one she hokds the blub and the world revolves around her."

"[leaving a birthday party with my pinata friend] i swear i didn't know they were going to do that ""Just take me home"""

"Darwin is a genius. Just realized I'm attracted to women in glasses because I'm more likely to reproduce with a woman who can't see me well."

"What do you call a flower in Florida? Orlando Bloom."

"[NSFW] Useless things Q: What are the most useless items ever invented? A: Condoms. If you need one, she's too old."

"What do you call a Black Abortion Clinic? Crime Stoppers. I'm going to hell"