116765

Joke of the Day

"As a kid, I was always scared of the dentist. He was a pedophile. You wouldn't believe the fillings he gave me."

"Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie's life? Because he was too far out maaaan. (Hippy voice)"

"A mushroom walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""We don't serve your kind here!"" And the mushroom says, ""Why not? I'm a fungi!"""

"[at bar] Gee, I'm so hungry I could eat a horse *nearby horse slams down his whisky* COME ON THEN TOUGH GUY *horse throws the 1st punch*"

"Babe, can u vacuum a Chess board into the carpet again? the guys r here for a lifesize game *guys standing around in armor & kings outfits*"

"My new girl friend. Just got a new Czech girlfriend, but its taken her nearly 5 days to hoover the house. Turns out she's a Slovak."

"What did the mod say when he was wrong? [BANNED]"

"I like when a girl wears a pearl necklace But only for the first 10 seconds or so. You know, before it's hard and crusty"

"Two animals taking a test were caught copying off each other... When one accuses the other... ""He's the CHEETAH!"" ""What? You're LION!"""

"New study reveals that women slightly overweight live longer than the men who mention it"