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Joke of the Day

"What happened when Steve Irwin forgot to put on sunscreen? He got hurt from harmful rays"

"If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?"

"Having anal sex in the splits... A hole body stretch."

"Why do hippies wear corduroy? It's groovy!"

"*Walks into school* Simon says give me your Pokemon cards Ok now close your eyes *Walks out* Kids are so dumb I didn't even say Simon says"

"[me holding a door] PRETTY GIRL: [over her shoulder] thanks. ME: sorry, i'm married, but in time you'll get over me."

"What did the woman say to her husband who constantly turns the heater up way too high? ""This is why we can't have ice things!"""

"I've been thinking about Oscar Pistorious's case... I don't think he's got a leg to stand on."

"*sees Arnold Schwarzenegger working at Walmart* ""hey Arnold, kitchen appliances are toward the back of aisle B right?"" ""YES. AISLE B, BACK"""

"How many Dornishmen does it take to shoe a horse? Nine. One to do the shoeing, and eight to lift up the horse!"