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Joke of the Day

"Doctor: You have acute alcoholism. Me: Thanks, but let me tell you it's not very cute in the morning."

"A baby seal walks into a club... That's it. A baby seal walks into a club. o_o"

"Why do some race drivers hate wet tracks? Because the water is a distraction."

"If it's so good why can't I find a single car wash that carries the Brazilian wax thingy you guys keep tweeting about?"

"pope: love all *everyone cheers* *he serves a tennis ball right into the crowd* pope: fifteen-love"

"Men are funnier than women Scientists say humor resides in the penis. I think this is true; people are always laughing when they see mine"

"Fun fact: the person who said ""If you love something let it go"" died alone, surrounded by 342 cats."

"My girlfriend keeps complaining that nothing in this sub is funny She'll NEVER see this line because she doesn't open them."

"How many letters are there in the Pirate Alphabet? Ten. Aye, aye, arr, and the seven seas."

"What do you call a Chinese woman with one leg? Irene."