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Joke of the Day

"It's not cool to skip on dating someone who talks funny -- just because your english is gooder than theirs be."

"Love is like a unicorn. I don't have a unicorn."

"I totally understand how batteries feel... ...because I'm rarely ever included in things either."

"My husband asked if I've heard of Justin Bieber. Then he hooked up the horse and plowed the back 40 because he's Amish, apparently."

"They should roast Tom Cruise sometime... Call it the Cruise-ifixion"

"My girlfriend of 3 years has never told me a joke. We are in a serious relationship."

"Why don't birds ever wear underwear? Because their pecker is on their head."

"Going to the gym is such a great workout. I never actually enter the building, but the walk there is nice. Sometimes I even walk back."

"Firemen are always really friendly, until they figure out it was you that started the fire."

"Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot."