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Joke of the Day
"Once I've read about the perils of alcoholism I've decided to stop... ...reading."
Next Joke
"You know what's odd? Numbers that are not divisible by 2"
"Have you heard about the new restaurant on Mars? The atmosphere was ok, but the place looked a bit rusty."
"Guy threw a banana peel out the window into my lane 2day. Yrs of practice paid off and I arrived to work safely. Thank you Mario Kart."
"[Date] Her: *giggles* whoops you got a hair right there Me (nervous she's trying to clone me): give it back"
"They should make fortune cookies with more obtainable fortunes: You will vacuum the living room. You will run into the coffee table."
"Have you heard about the sequel to the Exorcist ? In the new version, a woman hires the Devil to get a priest out of her son."
"Some idiot asked me what the 27th letter of the Arabic alphabet is... And all I could say was, ""Wow""."
"*arrives in hell* *Hey Ya starts playing* haha nice love this song *song ends* ... *Hey Ya starts playing* wait no"
"Condoms are really counterproductive."