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Joke of the Day

"Don't forget to smile today, but not that creepy smile that makes us all wonder how many bodies are buried in your yard."

"What did the homeless rapper say to the passerby? Hey man, can you spare 50 cents?"

"My boss yelled at me yesterday ""It's the fifth time you've been late to work this week! Do you know what that means?!"" I said, ""Probably that it's Friday?""..."

"Happy birthday to Jay Leno. Born April 28, 1950. Dies nightly at 11:35 eastern, 10:35 central."

"What do you call a heard of masturbating cows? ....Beef stroganoff"

"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!"

"What's the lightest thing in the world? The penis, Because we can lift it with a thought."

"What is a firewalker's favorite snack? Tostitos."

"Why did everyone hate the shoe company? It had no soul."

"This afternoon, I was attacked by a group of gay men. I didn't know how to escape. I had to beat them off left and right"