114537

Joke of the Day

"What's a linguist's favorite beverage? IPA"

"Why did the punk cross the road. He was stapled to the chicken."

"Have you heard the one about the suicidal farmer that liked to mutilate cows? He was a danger to himself and udders. Edit: Spelling"

"To the person crowding me in the checkout line, do you want a hug .. 'cause if you get any closer, I'm gonna assume you do and give you one."

"Did you hear the new classical piece of music commissioned by the church? It's called ""I slipped and fell in A minor""."

"I don't know it Switzerland is a good country But the flag is a big plus."

"""DON'T YOU DIE ON ME!"" he screamed at his phone. Everyone else on the train hugged their phones a bit closer."

"People think I'm weird because I swallowed an abacus They're forgetting it's what's on the inside that counts."

"What's the most sensitive part on a female dinosaur? Her clitosaurus..."

"Why do comedians always have such bad sleeps? Because they fall asleep funny!"