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Joke of the Day

"Why is flatulence more satisfying after a long struggle to push it out? Because you know you made a real ef-**fart**"

"I told a riddle to a double amputee once Boy did it leave him stumped"

"If you've been unemployed for a while, update your resume to say youve been a Blockbuster manager for the last decade. HOW WOULD THEY KNOW!?"

"How many sith lords does it take to change a light bulb? None. They like it on the dark side."

"What did Dracula say at the Christmas party ? Fancy a bite ?"

"So I'm here at the wailing wall, like a moron, with my harpoon."

"1.Why did Sara fall off the swing?? 2.Knock Knock 1.She didn't have any arms!! 2. Who's there? NOT SARA!!"

"I saw a sign that said ""watch for kids""... Sounds like a fair trade."

"Bill cosby is like life They both end up fucking you"

"*into earpiece during date* Ok now maintain eye contact No not that kind of contact Bro do not touch her eyes Get your eye away from hers"