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Joke of the Day

"I didn't think it was funny when I first wrote this one... I gair aunty this is gonna be five steps removed from swishing nebraskan listerine on a gold claim. ...I was right."

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"I still remember the day the dentist removed my braces. My trousers fell down and he molested me."
"What do you call a mix between an umingmak and a wealthy Canadian-American inventor? An Elon Muskox! please don't kill me"
"Do you know why the Little Mermaid wore seashells? Because she was too small for D shells."
"Q: How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet."
"Missionary Impossible: When 2 fat people try to have sex."
"Why was the Scandinavian atheist warm? He had Thor doubt."
"I can give out my number and I bet 8152898509 dollars my phone will still be dry."
"I saw some nudity on TV last night... I just sat there shaking my fist. I was furious."
"What's it called when an Arabic author releases their latest novel after dinner? Post-Hummus"