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Joke of the Day

"How many redditers does it take to change a light bulb? 3. One to screw it in, the next to claim credit and the third to be a bot that reposts."

"What do you call a psychiatric patient who is afraid of doors? Unhinged"

"Watching cooking shows makes you realize how much forehead sweat is possibly in your food"

"It took me 13 years but I finally deleted most of my e-mails."

"My Facebook movie is okay, but the book was better."

"Whats the best fat guy pickup line? If you think I'm fat, you should see my chubby!"

"Three words are having an argument... Had, Made, and Did were having a very heated argument. They became more and more agitated as the argument went on. It was beyond tense... It was past tense."

"Buttsex is a lot like spinach If you're forced to have it as a child. You'll never enjoy it as an adult. Thank you Daniel Tosh."

"How do you pleasure a capitalist? An invisible handjob."

"If vampires have no reflection, how come they have such neat hair?"