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Joke of the Day

"[meeting aboard the ISS space station] Capt: all personnel are-David sit down please Me trying to open a window cos it's stuffy: in a minute"

"Open letter to the mods of /r/Jokes [deleted]"

"If we get rid of all the margarine the world will be a butter place."

"I heard a pun about German sausages... But it was the wurst pun I've ever heard."

"Good girls go to heaven . . . bad girls make you feel like your there ."

"TIFU by posting in the wrong sub. Wait..."

"Did you guys hear about the serial killer who's using smaller and smaller socks to strangle each new victim? Be careful, they say he's still at large."

"Just because I don't talk to you, or text you first, doesn't mean I don't miss you. I'm just waiting for you to miss me."

"One of my friends is halfway through medical school He signs all his emails ""M."""

"Ghost: never eats, never sleeps, moans a lot Vampire: sucks the life out of u Werewolf: human w/ fits of howling Child: all of the above"