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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a serial killing cannibal who catches on fire easily? Flammable Lector."

"Don't you hate it when... you spend thirty minutes searching for a video, only to close it two minutes later."

"I had a threesome planned for Valentines Day... There were a couple of no-shows, but I had a good time anyway."

"Today, I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a wall... ...As he turned and sneered at me, I thought: 'that's a little condescending'."

"Spinach is like Anal Sex If your forced to have it as a child you won't enjoy it as an adult"

"Did you hear about the jurisprudence fetishist that walked into a courtroom? He got off on a technicality."

"Ferguson? What about Fergdudaughter? Must have Asian parents."

"seems like you must have been preeeetty stupid to get caught for murder in the 1800s"

"*writing suicide letter Goodbye cruel world. Your going to really miss me when I'm gone... Cat: *you're"

"I got in from the pub and poured myself a glass of water. ""You're drunk, aren't you?"" said a disappointed voice behind me. ""What makes you say that, honey?"" I asked. She said, ""This isn't your house."""