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Joke of the Day

"If you're an astronaut and you don't end every relationship by saying ""look, I just need space"" then you're wasting everyone's time."

"Did you hear the joke about Ebola? ...well you're probably not going to get it."

"I think that's enough coffee. I can hear my cells dividing."

"Dad walks in on son fapping He says,""Son that'll make you go blind!"" The young man says,""Dad I'm over here, that's a lamp."""

"*Shocking News*: Critics Say Kindergartner's Homework ""Doesn't Add Up"""

"Girls who say, ""a lot of guys are after me"", should keep in mind that low prices always attract many customers."

"Why do marble statues look so mean? They have hearts of stone."

"What's the difference between Snow-men and Snow-women? Snowballs."

"in these hard times, it's crucial to stay as positive as Charlie Sheen"

"Q. What does a woman's asshole do when she is having an orgasm? A. He is usually home with the kids!"