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Joke of the Day

"Why did the bald man put a rabbit on his head? Because he wanted a head of hare (hair)."

"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a guy, on the side of the highway reciting the alphabet backwards and trying to walk a straight line."

"Sleeping Beauty is my favorite Disney movie where the curse sounds amazing."

"All work and no play... .... makes Abraham Lincoln a full term president. Im going to hell."

"So now they're feeding cow marijuana infused grain? That isn't for me... ...those steaks are too high."

"I heard there's a new movie coming out where an illegal immigrant turns vigilante and battles a child molester... They're calling it Alien vs Predator."

"What do you call a bad hairdresser who is also very expensive? A rip-off."

"whoever decided how to spell camouflage is a terrible terrible person"

"I lost 7 followers today. It's nice to know some people are finally reading my tweets"

"What's a kidnapper's favorite kind of shoes? White Vans"