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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between an old-time organ grinder and a heroin addict? One has a monkey on a leash and the other has a monkey on his back."

"What is yellow and eats beetles for a living? Yoko Ono."

"What's the most problematic time of day? 4:04"

"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anybody can roast beef, but it takes a special skill to pea soup."

"Why do people tip cows? Their service isn't even that good."

"Mythology gags, anyone? What can kill you with a glance and goes ""Hittthhh""? The Basilisp."

"Finally cleaned out the fridge to make meal planning easier. Tonight, we're having buttered olives with mustard and baking soda."

"Socialist jokes are the best. Everyone gets them."

"Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one."

"I've clicked on every shady ad that I've seen for the past 12 years. My penis is now 648 feet long."