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Joke of the Day
"How can you get rich by eating? Eat fortune cookies."
Next Joke
"How is a vagina like a grapefruit? The best ones squirt when you eat them!"
"if your newborn baby has a full head of hair that means it is a business baby and is ready to enter the world of finance"
"I want to open a Reserve to breed, arm and train West Lowland Gorillas to fight Jihadists. I'm going to call it Boko Harambe"
"Stepped on an action figure in the shower and simultaneously invented six new cuss words in four different languages."
"I was wondering why the night had to be this long... ...Then it dawned upon me."
"What do you call a beautiful woman on a bassist's arm? A tattoo."
"Why do we have oceans? Because based god and acid god had a baby."
"Since it's the thought that counts I'll just keep on thinking about doing exercise."
"Life is like huffing butane... first you huff the butane, then you die"