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Joke of the Day

"[interview at winery] What strengths do you bring to the job? *long pause while Jesus glares at interviewer* Are you being serious right now"

"If I had a dollar for everyone I work with who's dumber than me, I'd have $11 cause I work for a small company."

"Why do feminists hate Medusa? She's always objectifying people."

"Descartes walks into a bar... The bartender asked if he wanted a drink. Descartes said ""I think not!"" ....and promptly disappeared."

"How do you find and old man in the dark? Just feel around. It's not hard."

"Nine out of ten people enjoy gangbangs ...But I only have group sex when it's consensual."

"Great news insomniacs! Only 12 sleeps til Christmas."

"Doctor doctor I keep thinking I'm a bee Buzz off can't you see I'm busy?"

"The life of a clown A clown goes to his boss to ask for a raise, the boss replies: ""20 years working for me and you finally make me laugh."""

"What would be a good name for my daughter who is a synth? Synthia"