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Joke of the Day

"I just saw a guy with no legs. I told him all about my recent stubbed toe. I hope it made him feel better about the whole no legs thing."

"Women's magazines: 20 pages ""accept yourself"" 40 pages ""loose 30kgs in 4 weeks"" And Cake recipes.."

"Everyone buries their problems in different ways. I bury them alive because killing people is wrong."

"T-Rex probably died from the spread of disease since he couldn't use the soap dispensers without smashing his face into the mirror."

"The spider I just killed with a napkin isn't in the napkin, and now I'm in a circle of salt reciting incantations."

"When a man tries to hug me hello or goodbye I whisper in his ear ""tip to tip"" and sigh as we embrace to ensure we never do it again."

"What Does a Man With a 12 Inch Cock Have For Breakfast? This morning I had a boiled egg."

"Too bad the Kardashian show couldn't be like ""The Ring"" and kill anyone who watches it."

"How can a woman make you a millionaire? When you marry her as a billionaire."

"Girl I like keeps putting me in the ""dad zone"" Good thing this weekend is Father's Day."