111982

Joke of the Day

"Delivering the punchline too early. You know what's the only thing worse than delivering the punchline to a joke too late?"

"The angry moment when you plug your charger into your phone but you realize hours later your charger wasn't plugged in."

"Did you know tank tops were illegal until the U.S constitution came out? It gave people the right to bare arms."

"Interviewer: Why did you leave your last job? [flashback to everyone chanting ""SHIT PANTS""] Me: It was just time for a change."

"What is ISIS' favourite OS? Windows XPlosion"

"Here, take my hand. Now slap yourself with it."

"What does the ""LL"" in LL Cool J stand for? Lickin Lips"

"""Wanna hear a joke about being shot by the police?"" ""No thanks, I get depressed by black humour."" Maybe I should cross-post this to /r/ImGoingToHellForThis"

"Why is ""fuck you"" an insult? I mean, i fuck my self every day"

"""When I learned how to edit videos I felt like the Flash..."" Friend: ""Why, because you fast learner?"" Me: ""No, because I fucked up the timeline."""