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Joke of the Day
"What do you call two siblings that take your money? Fine brothers"
Next Joke
"My friend woke up this morning in fits of laughter. I think he must have slept funny."
"[me, to my brother] I can't believe we've never been to Coachella [my Ukrainian grandfather] when I your age, bear eat my wife"
"How do British people explain a period..? Bloody Hell"
"What do vegan zombies eat? GRAAAAAAAINS!"
"[ouija board] How are you feeling? *board begins spelling* O-O-E-Y--G-O-O-E-Y What the!? A cheesy board!? G-O-U-D-A--G-U-E-S-S"
"Nothing makes me want to leave a web page more than a popup window saying, ""Are you sure you want to leave this page?"""
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Camila ! Camila who ? Camila minute !"
"Just overheard a construction worker in NYC very angrily say ""there's no way to make brown rice taste good by itself."""
"Just went for a piss while still wearing my microphone and the whole conference heard me call the urinal a ""thirsty boy"""