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Joke of the Day

"Science fact! There is a species of antelope capable of jumping higher than the average house. This is largely due to the antelope's powerful hind-legs and the fact that the average house cannot jump."

"A man tell his waitress he would like to order a beer When she asks what brand of beer he would like to drink he replies with, ""Root"". And dads all over the world sighed with satisfaction ."

"A son to his mother: Mum, I don't like grandma. The mother: Shut up, we eat what we have!"

"Stop making history jokes!! They're getting old."

"What you gon' do with all that junk? All that junk inside your trunk? I'ma get get get get you a Neti Pot - a concerned vet to an elephant"

"What was the dog doing on the turnpike? About seven miles an hour."

"Have you ever had sex while camping? Its fucking in tents!"

"Waitress: 'Do u have any questions about the menu?' Me: 'What kind of font is this?'"

"What's it called when a vampire kisses you goodnight? Necking."

"APOLLO: I'll be god of the sun HERMES: OK I'll take light- A: I'm also light ARTEMIS: I'll take music A: No I'm also music. That's me too"