110015

Joke of the Day

"What was the currency of the Trade Republic of Venice? Dogecoin."

"My mother asked me today if I was more attracted to breasts or butts.. I told her to shut up and put her robe back on."

"I'm starting a new abortion clinic and naming it... Scrambled Eggs."

"Floaters What do you call that which barks during the day and floats during the night ? - Your grandma's jaws"

"'NSFW' Why didn't Mrs. Claus ever have kids? Because Santa always comes down the chimney."

"Got kicked out of Barnes and Noble for moving the ""Caution Wet Floor"" sign to the Fifty Shades of Gray aisle."

"{Text} Me: Come home soon baby, I'm dressed like Leia.. Him: So turned on, I am.. Me: If you show up dressed like Yoda it's not happening"

"Why do bachelors like smart women? Because they're so rare."

"I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high... She seemed surprised."

"I bought my nephew a drum set because: A) I'm an awesome uncle B) Learning to play an instrument is important C) I hate my sister"