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Joke of the Day

"Rock-a-bye-baby is my favorite nursery rhyme about the tragic consequences of putting babies in trees."

"What's Whitney Houston's favourite type of co-ordination? HAND-EYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!"

"You need subtitles. Me to every 2yr old."

"How many bodybuilders does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to do it, a second to keep yelling, ""You're lookin' BIG, man!"""

"..because I always go through the punch-line first I'm usually buzzed by the end of the cake-line.."

"Most Contradictory Inspirational Quote Ever? ""Follow Your Dreams."" -Freddy Kreuger, 2016"

"Act your age, not your sperm count... Cause otherwise you'd be old as balls!"

"A cannibal walked into a female patient's surgery room... ""I'll take the eggs, please."""

"Maybe the baby wasn't on board. Maybe the baby was against the whole thing."

"What stopped winter from coming? Winterfell and it can't get up."