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Joke of the Day

"[Dark humor] What do you call a not-hungry ethiopian? Dead."

"I see dead people. No wait, I take that back. I see people I want dead."

"Why did Peter Parker get fired? He spent all day on the web."

"If you have Alzheimer's, look on the bright side... ...at least you can hide your own Easter Eggs."

"Weird how Superman's an alien but looks exactly like a white dude & then he landed in Kansas & not say, mainland China"

"I got this amazing girl's number at work today See you later Jane Doe 522/16!"

"I just don't get it...My wife's friends come to MY house, knock on MY door, and then give me the ""why aren't you wearing pants"" look."

"What's wet on the inside, hairy on the outside, starts with C and ends in T? Coconut."

"When's the best time of day to start a diet? 4:00 For:Klock"

"My great-grandmother lived to be 106 and never needed glasses. She always just drank straight from the bottle."