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Joke of the Day
"I see dead people. No wait, I take that back. I see people I want dead."
Next Joke
"You have 2,000 friends on FB and your profile pic was taken in the mirror? You couldn't find one of your ""friends"" to take it?"
"What is the healthiest college? Rice"
"I've never smoked weed before but the frequency with which I pass out, hand in a bag of snack chips, leads me to believe I'd be good at it."
"I play the triangle in a reggae band... ... I stand at the back and ting"
"What happens when you give a cow marijuana? The ""steaks"" get higher"
"What's the opposite of assault? a pepper."
"How do call an idiot that has an assault rifle pointed at you? Sir."
"What do you call a supernatural goose riding a bike seeking vengeance? Goose Rider"
"My wife told me not to say anything about her friend's lazy eye so I made sure to give numerous compliments on her super-athletic one."