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Joke of the Day

"When that guy has sex with his wife on a motorcycle he's ""cool."" When I do it I'm ""absconding with the cadaver."""

"Checking my phone one more time before I go to sleep because apparently 533 times wasn't enough today."

"Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat."

"A dad asks 4-year-old son: ""How'd you sleep last night?"" Son says: ""umm... With my eyes closed?"" Edit: This actually happened btw. Probably funnier irl."

"Bioluminescent fry said to have a bright future"

"Yo mama is so hairy... ...She doesn't have a bush, she has a whole damn rain forest."

"Black lives matter But only three fifths as much"

"A JokeExplainBot walks into a bar... The bartender says ""Hey! We don't serve robots in here."" The JokeExplainBot replies menacingly, ""Oh, you will... Someday, you will."""

"My favorite part of deleting your history... ...is when you can still go to the previous page."

"My brother... Likes driving black and white F1 race cars. They call him the F1 racist."