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Joke of the Day

"My favorite Yoga Pose is the Upward Facing Couch Potato."

"My interior decorator quit on her first day on the job. I told her to paint all the walls in my house to be green screens."

"Wife: ""I'm going to bed, honey."" Husband: ""Okay, sweetheart. I'll go get you a tylenol."" Wife: ""But why? I don't have a headache."" Husband: ""Great! Let's fuck."""

"As soon as you take a single slice of pizza... ...there's no longer enough to go around."

"Obama sure is waiting until the last minute to take everyone's guns."

"My girlfriend and I tried Anal sex for the first time today. It was a little ruff at first but I'm finally managing to sit down again."

"I am a man who adheres to ""do unto others as you would have them do unto you"" literally that's why I am still a virgin"

"I do ten sit ups every morning. It might not sound like much, but there are only so many times you can hit the snooze button."

"I'm up all night to get lucky, My dog that ran away"

"Procrastination - Making a better today, tomorrow"