108033

Joke of the Day

"Mexican drug lords now have ig and keep posting selfies with stacks of money, mansions and yachts. I think the army... could really learn something from that recruitment campaign."

"I was gonna make a gay joke... Butt fuck it"

"Mulder: we're trapped with ghosts in the stomach of a metal worm. Scully: those are just people, Mulder. We're on a train."

"I can tell these $80 Nikes are going to help me get from the couch to the bathroom six times a day a lot faster."

"I'll always remember Granddad's last words to me... ""WHAT'RE YOU DOING IN HERE WITH THAT HAMMER?"""

"Did you hear about the reusable condoms? When you're done, turn them inside out and shake the fuck out of them."

"What do a chick and KFC have in common? Once you're done enjoying the legs, thighs and breasts your left with a greasy box to stick your bone in."

"What do you do to an elephant with three balls? Walk him, and pitch to the giraffe!"

"Poem flipped around Jack and Jill went up the hill so jack could lick her candy. He got a shock and a mouthful of cock because Jill's real name was randy"

"Why Don't Lobsters Share? Because they're shellfish."